The Power to Change You is only Yours.

I asked my Facebook readers to give me examples of traits they liked and disliked when looking for a mate. The compiled list is below. LoveLoathe

“What was the point of this little experiment?”

Everyone has likes and dislikes. They can differ greatly from person to person. One person’s deal breaker is another person’s deal maker.

So why on earth would you allow another person to tell you to change?

I have extremely fair skin. Once I learned what a tan was I wanted one. It was what I was supposed to have, right? Magazines, movies, television, and real people in my life revered skin tanned to a golden bronze. Personally, I think tans can be attractive but I’ll never have one. My skin won’t accept the sun, it flat-out rejects it. The sun refuses to be turned away and before you know it I look like the mascot for a certain seafood restaurant franchise.

When I hit puberty my wavy hair kinked up into Shirley Temple curls. No joke. I had ringlets from root to tip. Girls my age were flat ironing every minuscule curve out of their hair and my hair was loopy looped out of its mind.

I met Mr. B when I was a freshman in high school. My hair was the first thing he noticed about me. You want to know how much he cared about my lack of a tan? Not at all. Never paid attention to it in the first place. Mr. B does have one deal breaker which I don’t possess, obviously. He dislikes moles on the face or neck.

Let’s take a moment to remember two women who made a fortune off their mole.


Supermodel Cindy Crawford


Actress Marilyn Monroe

I don’t fancy freckles (though I have them. Could be something to that.) Then it was brought to my attention that Jensen Ackles has freckles and I realized it was mostly in my head. I went looking for pictures of actors, actresses, and models with freckles. Guess what? They’re very attractive.


Jensen Ackles is so pretty.

14d0313d4ef47dfe46c236f724cacb8dThe lady in the picture above is Kelly Reilly. By an eerie twist of fate I watched her in a movie two nights ago. She’s incredibly sexy but in a softer way. Tons of freckles and I like them. Deal breakers can change, but you shouldn’t unless you want to.

To sum this all up, don’t give yourself a hard time because genetics didn’t gift you with the current fashion trend. Those trends are going to change like the weather in the Midwest. If the object of your affection can’t get over something about you or your looks, I give you permission NOT to change yourself for them. Just around the corner could be someone who’ll appreciate what others didn’t.

I get comments on my colorful hair all the time and they aren’t all good ones. *shrugs* Guess it’s a good thing I’m not running around forcing bottles of hair dye on people.

The person in charge of how you should look is you. If you want to change, then that’s cool but it’s also cool if you’re happy to stay the same.



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